Not everyone has a story to tell of when it comes to fish burgers.
I do. :)
See, I didn't really eat fish burgers when I was younger. Not because I couldn't afford to, not because I didn't like breaded fish fillets or tartar sauce, but because I didn't think I needed to. See, I'd always had hamburgers or cheeseburgers at McDonalds, and they were good and fine for me, so much so that the McChicken and Filet-o-Fish and Chicken Nuggets might as well didn't exist to me.
And they didn't, really.
At a friend's birthday party at McDonalds, the birthday planner instructed us kids to raise our hands to show her what we wanted from the menu. When she called out 'hamburger', I raised mine. Later the Parent said I was silly. I could have tried something else that I usually didn't take. Like a Filet-o-Fish.
I wanted to tell her that I liked the hamburger and that it didn't really matter to me.
But I didn't say so. :)
The Parent still doesn't know why either.
What The Parent does know is that I'm still one heck of a stubborn these days. That when I find something good and great and fantastic, I stick like glue to it and I don't let go. If I think it works, if I think it makes me happy and is helpful to me and doesn't harm me, I'm a loyalist- hopefully- till the end. Like Glitter Nail Polish. Like the Hallyu Movement. Like Coffee. Like Popcorn.
And if I so feel like trying something new, well, hey, new discovery! Otherwise, it doesn't matter very much whether I stick to what's comfortable for me, does it not? I like being in my comfort zone. :) And so far it hasn't done me any bad.
Then again, when there's the risk of danger, or when there's the presence of abuse involved, staying in the comfort zone is a no-no. Absolutely not. Yet, more often than not, it is easier said than done.
We humans have a tendency to cope and adapt to whatever situation that presents itself in front of us, and regardless of how ugly, how helpless, how hurtful, how confusing, how awful, how painful, how uncertain it might all be, we still remain, relying on inner resources and coping mechanisms to deal with the mental, emotional and physical trials that befall us. And when we feel like we're screwing up, we look to memes, encouraging words, motivational phrases, our own pride and stronger-than-us icons to keep us going forward.
It helps, I'm certain of that, for the day to day.
But I ask, what happens when that icon you look toward and cling on to, hurts you, destroys you and abandons you? What happens when that icon- who isn't some worldwide iconic figure like Jack Ma or Richard Branson or Nelson Mandela- but is someone closer to home, makes you worship him or her in one beat, and in the very next, seeks to destroy you, and because you're in your comfort zone, because you want to continue in your comfort zone, you decide that better be this, than to have none at all?
Here's another story associated with a fish burger.
But really not a very pleasant one at all, this one.
Because how could she, this lady, have known, that with just that one consumption of a fish burger for dinner, she'd subsequently have her life irrevocably changed?
How could she have known that, having finished eating it, that there'd be physical consequences which would then lead to emotional consequences which would then lead to a gradual, torturous abandonment by the very iconic figure whom she'd so admired and trusted?
And how could she have known that the same iconic figure, having left her to fend for herself would cut off, slowly, limb by limb the connection they once shared, leaving her entirely to herself, and after that, turn around in spite, hatred and evil, to make attempts to harm her, hurt her and destroy her wholly and completely, taking away not just her dignity, but also, her sense of self-esteem, decades of dedicated love and more importantly, her years of life lived?
Never obvious, never certain, never absolute this all was, and whether she should have known, or whether she should not have known, that's no longer important to her anymore.
It's just gone. 50 years of her life, poof, gone up in smoke and ashes, leaving behind nothing else but tears, despair, lingering regret and questions, questions and more and more questions.
Right after that one, normal, everyday thing of a damn fish burger.
I do. :)
 |
| Not from McDonalds |
And they didn't, really.
At a friend's birthday party at McDonalds, the birthday planner instructed us kids to raise our hands to show her what we wanted from the menu. When she called out 'hamburger', I raised mine. Later the Parent said I was silly. I could have tried something else that I usually didn't take. Like a Filet-o-Fish.
I wanted to tell her that I liked the hamburger and that it didn't really matter to me.
But I didn't say so. :)
The Parent still doesn't know why either.
What The Parent does know is that I'm still one heck of a stubborn these days. That when I find something good and great and fantastic, I stick like glue to it and I don't let go. If I think it works, if I think it makes me happy and is helpful to me and doesn't harm me, I'm a loyalist- hopefully- till the end. Like Glitter Nail Polish. Like the Hallyu Movement. Like Coffee. Like Popcorn.
And if I so feel like trying something new, well, hey, new discovery! Otherwise, it doesn't matter very much whether I stick to what's comfortable for me, does it not? I like being in my comfort zone. :) And so far it hasn't done me any bad.
Then again, when there's the risk of danger, or when there's the presence of abuse involved, staying in the comfort zone is a no-no. Absolutely not. Yet, more often than not, it is easier said than done.
We humans have a tendency to cope and adapt to whatever situation that presents itself in front of us, and regardless of how ugly, how helpless, how hurtful, how confusing, how awful, how painful, how uncertain it might all be, we still remain, relying on inner resources and coping mechanisms to deal with the mental, emotional and physical trials that befall us. And when we feel like we're screwing up, we look to memes, encouraging words, motivational phrases, our own pride and stronger-than-us icons to keep us going forward.
It helps, I'm certain of that, for the day to day.
But I ask, what happens when that icon you look toward and cling on to, hurts you, destroys you and abandons you? What happens when that icon- who isn't some worldwide iconic figure like Jack Ma or Richard Branson or Nelson Mandela- but is someone closer to home, makes you worship him or her in one beat, and in the very next, seeks to destroy you, and because you're in your comfort zone, because you want to continue in your comfort zone, you decide that better be this, than to have none at all?
Here's another story associated with a fish burger.
 |
| Not this one either |
Because how could she, this lady, have known, that with just that one consumption of a fish burger for dinner, she'd subsequently have her life irrevocably changed?
How could she have known that, having finished eating it, that there'd be physical consequences which would then lead to emotional consequences which would then lead to a gradual, torturous abandonment by the very iconic figure whom she'd so admired and trusted?
And how could she have known that the same iconic figure, having left her to fend for herself would cut off, slowly, limb by limb the connection they once shared, leaving her entirely to herself, and after that, turn around in spite, hatred and evil, to make attempts to harm her, hurt her and destroy her wholly and completely, taking away not just her dignity, but also, her sense of self-esteem, decades of dedicated love and more importantly, her years of life lived?
Never obvious, never certain, never absolute this all was, and whether she should have known, or whether she should not have known, that's no longer important to her anymore.
It's just gone. 50 years of her life, poof, gone up in smoke and ashes, leaving behind nothing else but tears, despair, lingering regret and questions, questions and more and more questions.
Right after that one, normal, everyday thing of a damn fish burger.