A Birthday in 2020

Blessed is one who lives through a year.

Blessed more is one who lives through a year with peace, joy, quiet and love. 

When my birthday swung by in the latter part of last year, there was really nothing a better birthday present than to have the presence of family, friends and loved ones all of whom were in peace and good health. 

Still, as life goes, we try to have a celebration whenever an occasion arises, and so that's what I did. 

Let's just say that there was more than one celebration, and let's just say that there was a lot of food. :D

There was the homecooked, the late-night, the prepped, and the self-prepared. 

All of which were special. 

Some, I have to say, especially more so, with The Parents buying up a packet of frozen siew mais from the supermarket downstairs, steaming them up, then arranging them on a plate with lettuce and cherry tomatoes thrown into the mix whilst rummaging around the fridge for anything to decorate the butter marble cake that they had bought to sing the song.

Others, however, were no less memorable. 

A late night supper at this mala xiang guo place near our home saw us having beef, beancurd skin, beancurd, seaweed, lettuce, Taiwanese sausage, mushrooms as well as a couple of quail eggs and cherry tomatoes that we sneakily dropped into the bowl. 

A McDonalds breakfast on a weekend saw me having my childhood fave of hotcakes, fast-food style scrambled eggs, and muffins.

A mookata one evening saw us having beef and pork and lettuce and carrots and sweet corn. 

And a dinner one evening had us getting a wide selection of tapas-looking dishes in the form of cute little servings on cute little plates accompanied by heaps of oysters, servings of sashimi, very good laksa and dessert.

All of this looks like a lot, but can I just tell you? 

What mattered most to me was the company- the people whom I was having the meals with- and I pray that in years ahead there shall be new company to come. 

Multiple Roles Is There A Line?

As a woman who kind of ended up into some sort of leadership role, I consider it a privilege that I have had the opportunity to meet people of varying positions doing varying roles in varying industries.

Through the years, I've met men and women from sole proprietorships, small medium enterprises and conglomerates. 

I've also met men and women in industries that range from technology, finance, energy, medical, entertainment, events and wellness. 

It's all very interesting, and if there's one thing I've come to realize, it is that men and women tend to treat their role very differently. 

Men like to talk. Sometimes they talk loud and long, sometimes they don't. I have had meetings with men for no more than twenty minutes. I have also had meetings with men for two and a half hours. 

Women, on the other hand, like to take it matter of fact when they talk about the purpose- like, yeah, that's how I started, here's the journey, here's where we are now, that's it. Otherwise they do all that in an escalator pitch and then jump straight into task driven made. 

I like the latter. 

But there are times when women take on too many tasks, and too many roles, all at the same time. 

So we were at this meeting, my colleague and I, with two others- a husband and wife team- at a cafe in Orchard. It was one of those easy, casual meetups befitting the nature of our discussion. The meeting got off to a good start- we introduced ourselves, introduced what it was we were doing, what it was we were planning to do, and how we could collaborate. Our counterparts too told us about themselves- where they came from, what they did, what they could offer.

And then it happened. 

Midway through, the wife- who had been holding her toddler on her lap all this while- told us that she had to do a 'very motherly' thing, hoped we didn't mind, we could carry on the discussion whilst she did this, and with an air that expected us to agree, promptly whipped out a cloth, and snuggled her child right up to her bosom.

We said we didn't mind- but unbeknownst to me- something did niggle- and that something did stay. 

It wasn't because they brought their child to the meeting. 

I didn't care about that.

It was more of that there are still lines that border on the professional versus the personal, and as grey as they might be, better it is for everyone to stay on the safe side.

You can say I'm mean. 

You can say I'm not understanding of women's struggles and the pain of having to balance the roles of wife, mother and working woman all at the same time. 

But the thing is, I do. 

We do. 

The struggles of childcare are real. 

That's why I didn't mind that the toddler was being a toddler during the meeting.

But one must understand that I've also put aside personal roles for the sake of coming here to hold a proper discussion, and between having the meeting continue as-is, perhaps it would have been better had she told us she needed to take a little pause from the discussion, and could we all go for a break together.

Fifteen minutes of casual chat whilst she nursed her child would not have broken the momentum of the discussion. 

Instead I started wondering if this was a professional situation, or a personal one.

I started wondering if I was speaking to a potential partner, or to a mother. 

And then I started wondering how she perceived herself (at this table). Was she placing the role of working woman as priority, or was she placing the role of mother overarching it all?

Now, before you say I'm hypocritical- "You didn't mind her babysitting her child, but you mind her nursing her child?"- let me say this, I can understand if one finds it hard (and expensive) to hire a babysitter for the entire work day, or for a span of two hours, but what does it cost to pause the discussion, switch the role, and come back to it after?

Fifteen minutes? Twenty? Thirty?

You see, it doesn't matter which industry you come from or how well you know your counterpart. There is such a thing as professional etiquette and boundaries which need adhering to. 

Maybe you don't need meeting minutes or presentation slides. 

Maybe you don't even need formal business wear. 

But by drawing that line of distinction between one role and the other, or attempting to, at least demonstrates a respect for the meeting agenda, at least indicates a respect for every participant in the meeting itself, and at least is apparent to everyone you know the etiquette, and that you've tried. 

Hilton's Tomahawk

You know you have a great deal on hand when a five-star offers you breakfast and dinner (in-house) meals within their staycation package. 

And that in true five-star fashion, neither their breakfast nor their dinner is delivered in slipshod standards too. 

One thing though- they've removed much of the frills from the rooms- and so at first glance, you might feel like you've gotten just a bareboned room- and nothing more. 

But, given that most hotels are still on a half-half basis these days, staycayers will just have to accept, and understand. 

I've never stayed in this Hilton before. 

Hilton Garden Inn at Race Course Road, yes, Checkers at elsewhere, also yes, just not in Hilton Orchard on this shopping street stretch. 

(Don't know why- I've bounced up and down a few of the other properties- but have always seemed to miss out on this one)

And so it was a pleasant surprise to find that the room- despite it being somewhat really just a room without the expected sight of writing paper and notepad and pen- continued to hold a mix of 'late 70s business trip' nostalgia. 

Not to say that it was old. 

Certainly not. 

The decor was contemporary, the place well maintained, and the business-like atmosphere in the room made it very effective to settle down at the glass-topped desk and work the afternoon away. 

The room had the necessary amenities- Crabtree & Evelyn toiletries in the bathroom, glasses and cups in the drawers and a selection of coffee and tea. 

Then there was also a mini fridge, devoid, however, of its regular selection of soft drinks, mineral waters, chocolates, and wines. Whilst it made little difference to me- with the convenience stores downstairs and the supermarkets nearby there's hardly a reason to pay room service prices for a can of Coke- but the sight of empty fridge was a glaring reminder of what the situation once was, and what it still continued to be. 

Thank goodness, then, that there was a dinner to look forward to. 

And a fantastic one it turned out to be too. 

It isn't every day that I get the chance to see a steak the size of a tomahawk in front of me. 

And it is rarer a chance to be able to have that same piece of a tomahawk for my dinner. 

A steak that size could only be consumed by two, of course, and so for two hours over we sat there at the table slowly sawing into the meat, cutting it up into little pieces (me) and dipping it in the sea salt and sauces by the side. 

I wish I could tell you what sauces they were, but it's been a while and although one of them I think was a cheese of some sort, I think, the other two I really don't quite remember. But all of them I tried, sea salt included, and all of them were good. 

Even though I can safely say I liked the cheese (if it's cheese) dipping sauce best of all. 

We had soup too. 

French onion soup. 

Because my dining companion has this thing for soup, and a place like the Hilton would not likely compromise on skill in French onion soup. 

Warm and comforting it turned out to be, a thick blanket of baked cheese covering a dark brown broth full of thickly-sliced onions swimming about inside. 

Along with all of this we each had several glasses of wine- the deal being that you could have as much wine as you wanted within two hours- so whilst my companion had two glasses of red and one of white, I stayed with two glasses of white instead. I think it was Moscato, what we had. 

It was a wonderful, charming evening with good food, pleasant company, and of course, all that wine made one become more relaxed than they intended to be. 

Not drunk, but once back in the room I conked off almost immediately. 

Thank goodness then that I woke the next day to the sun shining outside the windows, and the anticipation of a great breakfast awaiting me downstairs. 

We'd reserved our slot the day before so there was only a very short queue- hardly one, in fact- and were soon directed to a table. The breakfast menu had plenty of variety, and you could choose one main, plus a selection of as many sides as you wanted, as many times as you desired. I don't have a lot of pictures, but I ate a lot. 

Scrambled eggs, bacon, mushrooms, sausage, baked beans and toast, followed by rice krispies (I was greedy), followed by pastries, muffins and pancakes (I was greedier) then a platter of fruit, and a serving of yogurt, all of which was accompanied by cups of coffee and glasses of orange juice. 

On thinking back, I realize just how wonderful it was to have the opportunity to savor the morning meal in the hotel's restaurant.

At other times it might not have seemed just a big deal, but when you're in a year where hotels have seen a sharp drop in international tourists, where they have had to close their doors to guests even from local shores, where they have had even to ration out their rooms and close their restaurants (until such designated time), to be able to enter through the doors of the Hilton, to be able to have a room (without a toilet bowl brush on the bathroom floor), and to be able to enjoy a meal in their restaurant (without a need for takeaway)- a blessing it is, a blessing with a capital B it is- indeed. 

BBQ Korean-Chinese Style

The F&B scene here in this country has to be one of the most dynamic, and versatile ones I've come across. 

If one day a place can be, say, for yakiniku, where wait staff come to your table with the condiments, a few weeks later the place can be transformed into a hotpot buffet-style outfit where there are new furnishings on the wall, where the grills are replaced with pots, and where the staff replenish the ingredient trays and condiments counter to which you now go and help yourselves to.

It can also be a place that was (or appears to be) once a Korean-style BBQ but has been transformed into a place with mainlander vibes instead. 

It might have been the decor on the walls.

It might also have been the drinks chiller placed conspicuously at one side of the dining space for guests to have easy access to the beers and drinks. 

They had a very attentive server who brought us to a table by the window and brought the crockery and cutlery. Along with all of it also came the recommendations which we decided to go along with for our orders. 

To come for BBQ means to have meat- lots of it- and so beef took the bulk of our lunch that day. 

What exactly the meats we had I don't remember now- it's been a while- but the slices that came prettily rolled up on the platter were thinly sliced, and most importantly, fresh. If the aesthetics whetted the appetite, the freshness ensured that the flavors of the meats came out fully as they cooked over the grill. 

We probably had two, or is it three, kinds of meat. 

There certainly was beef, and I think we had lamb. 

Tender, delicious, and full of its natural flavors, the meats all had a bit of smokiness that came from being in the hands of an experienced professional who stood over the grill at our table and handled the tongs expertly. (The meat might have ended up burnt otherwise)

It was great having her to help with the grilling. 

All we needed to do was to eat. 

Very comfortable, I'd say, just that I kind of wish she'd dialed down on the recommendations a bit. I mean, the lamb (lightly marinated) might be one of the more popular choices on the menu but there's only so much a person can take in a single meal, and between the both of us, we knew that our potions were more than enough. 

We had to respectfully decline. 

(No she did not burn our meat) 

I didn't feel bad rejecting her recommendations either. 

After all, by then we'd already asked for more of the very fresh lettuce with the very big leaves (their fiber seems to help with the digestion), we were already wrapping some our of meats with the lettuce and dipping them in the sweet sauce provided, and we'd also eaten almost all of the complimentary banchan, including the kimchi and the very green, very tasty bits of Korean-type seaweed. 

Victor's Kitchen Dim Sum

Tucked away along a non-descript corridor of a building we call Sunshine Plaza is Victor's Kitchen, a little nook of a place that probably has to be one of the most under-rated, yet popularly known dim sum places ever. 

This is not a place with wall to wall furnishings or bright inviting lights that demand boisterous, noisy celebrations. 

Neither is this a place that has cushioned seating and wait staff decked out in neat, iron-pressed uniforms. 

The lighting here is whitish fluorescent. 

The tables here are arranged in rows- you sit wherever there's a place. 

And there're no shiny, chinoiserie style decorations on the walls. 

Victor's Kitchen is a place where you come for the food, the easy-going camaraderie, and the old-school vibes that homely places in these strata malls tend to bring. 

We were there a couple of months ago. 

For dinner. 

It isn't often that we make a decision to have dim sum at dinner time. 

But that day we weren't too keen on anything heavy, nor anything fried. More importantly we wanted to have something warm, fulfilling and light- and dim sum fit the bill. 

We went in, got directed to our seats, and the menu was brought. 

Amongst everything that was to be had for the choosing, including noodles, our appetite decided we'd share a bowl of pork and century egg porridge, a plate of cheong fun char siew, a basket of salted egg lava buns, a basket of xiaolongbaos and, just in case we still were hungry, a basket of siew mais as well. 

One thing about Victor's Kitchen- their service is efficient, and remarkably fast. 

Barely had payment been made (you pay at the counter upon ordering) that I got back to a table with several dishes already laid out there.

Everything was lovely. 

The siew mais were large, the meat was chewy and the little bit of (yellow) skin had been steamed so soft you could literally nibble it off as you ate. 

The porridge, prepared Cantonese style, was smooth and silky with just the right amounts of pork and century egg yolk bobbing about inside. 

Then the cheong fun (I think we took char siew) was smooth and chewy the way that thicker versions of rice rolls are prepared. 

I particularly liked the xiaolongbaos and the salted egg lava buns. 

Salted egg lava buns go by a variety of names- some quite fanciful- but in essence they're round-shaped buns with a filling of salted egg that is supposed to be steamed to the exact temperature where the paste flows out like a stream of golden lava when you break open the bun. 

Visually it's very calming. 

It's also very comforting. 

So I had two. 

In exchange for one of the xiaolongbaos which I (only) had one. 

I shall order two baskets next time. 

Or maybe I'll skip past all the main items on their menu and go straight for two baskets of xiaolongbaos, one plate of guotie, one basket of char siew paus and one basket of salted egg lava paus. 

All for me. 

By the way, they're known for their xiaolongbaos here. 

Affordable, solid, hearty and heartwarming- each dumpling meets no less the standards of any other more renowned restaurant, what with their perfectly pinched folds at the top, the chewy texture of their skin, the delicious burst of soup (which I always prefer to carefully slurp from the dumpling whilst trying not to burn my throat) and the soft, melt-in-the-mouth ball of meat.